Tuesday, June 25, 2013

Paula Deen....*SIGH!*

Paula, Paula, Paula....
  I know, I know. It looks nothing like her. I had limited time and I didn't want to start stealing pictures. I went to Abi-Station, closed my eyes, and without a picture, I threw together what I thought she sorta looked like. Throw the rotten tomatoes, already. Just like every other slob with a blog, I've got an opinion on this cooking and baking matriarch. Remember that word--OPINION. My feelings, my thoughts. Passionate as they may be, I'm not saying they are facts. Here we go. Rant mode in 3...2....1....

  Good Lord. I don't think I need to go into detail about what's up with Paula Deen these days. Eyes will roll, heated fans might be furiously typing the next line of fire as I speak. Still, I write. The latest line of fire created the itch and pushed me to make this blog post. (It's long, too.)

  Don't get me wrong. I loved all things Paula Deen. Her voice, her hair, the way she was fearless about her use of butter and other fattening goodies. Something about her just felt comfortable and...nice, I guess. I drooled over tasty recipes and was reminded of many Summers and tasty dishes I've wolfed down while in the South. I thought she was a grey-haired belle with all the class and sass in the world. I was thisclose to putting her peanut butter cookie recipe in my collection book. When I heard about this little nugget, everything came to a screeching halt. And then, of course, things went into full social networking swing. I could not stop reading, could not stop gasping, could not believe my eyes. Paula, Paula, Paula.

  I'm going to make this next part as direct as possible--I don't care when she said it. I don't care how many people she said it to/around/over/under/at a 45 degree angle--the sentiment, the thought, and utterance is unacceptable. What bothers me the most are the people who are defending the crap outta her--rushing to Food Network's FB page because they tanked her, calling it "nonsense" everywhere else, and saying the same thing over and over (aka--"big mistake" and "can't believe you guys"). I can't say I'm shocked about the rally in Savannah. I just...I'm cringing. She is still a "sweet old lady". Really? Really? This is one of those moments where a celebrity I love(d) has done an unforgivable thing. If you are not a person of color, if you have privilege in Western society, you will not fully understand.

  That last part? Not up for argument or debate. Don't tell me about certain rappers stepping on flags. Don't tell me about other rappers who talked about Former President Bush. I don't want to hear the "igger" and "igga" debate. Spare the commentary on AAVE in general. Especially if you aren't a part of the culture. The mentality that excuses Paula Deen and dismisses what she says won't let you completely see the other side. I think this is why all the comments for her get on my nerves. I'm on the other side, seeing all these people say "so what" and "get over it" because they don't know what it's like to be called something REALLY ugly. Last year around Christmas, I was deleting comment after comment from an anonymous user calling me all sorts of versions of the N-word. This is a troublesome word for some people. It is a triggering word. I don't want to hear about how "we" use it. I just...ugh...there are so many layers to this.

  What else can be said? She isn't the first personality come under controversy for racially charged/ignorant statements. She isn't the first person to create a vague video of a crappy apology. Just like other celebs, she will get her turn in the doghouse. Companies will continueto drop  her, Fox News will probably pick her up with loving arms, and the masses who continue to stan for her will forgive her and spit on everyone else who hasn't. The problem? The fact that this kind of behavior has a cycle. The fact that people expect folks to "just get over it". Why? Because it's acceptable to you? Because it happens so much? Because "we" keep talking about it?

 No, don't mind me. I'm just a female blogger of color who's pretty freakin' tired of...everything. Tired of close-minded people, tired of people who keep saying "it's their age" and "it's the time they grew up in", as if that excuses someone from the consequence of what they've said. Forget the person or persons who've been offended, right? Tell them to walk it off, while we praise and support the person who still gets to think it's okay to marinate in that mentality. And I promise you this--she has not changed one bit. She'll make some PR moves to make it look like she cares. Rinse and repeat, she's loved again. Awwww.

  A lot of people just flat out don't care. Of course it's nothing new. Such is life, as another person who disagrees with her behavior churns out another eye-rolling commentary. It's interesting that so many people rush to defend her. Are these some of the same people who write ugly things about other people of color? Are these the same people who "miss the good old days"? No, let's not group everything and everyone. Let's try not to stereotype and assume the worst of people.

  Maybe some people are upset she is gone because they don't know what the heck to cook for dinner anymore. Maybe some people are upset she is gone, because her show is a part of their afternoons. No, it can't be that people are over the "nonsense" of racism. It can't be that people applaud what she said. This is a post-racial society, isn't it?

(*Sarcasm alarm goes off, explodes, melts into a puddle*)

  Paula Deen can have all the likes and support in the world. She can ask for all the prayers she wants, all the love, and have all the people willing to bake themselves in front of her business/businesses in support of her. She probably doesn't care about the people who won't forgive her. Her industry won't crumble on the folk who are online, furiously typing and posting against her. It's painful (and a little funny, actually) to watch the people who love her so much say the things I've seen so far. It's interesting to see the cute little FB pages in her honor. Poor Paula, right? Having to actually face consequences? Gasp.

  I suppose that at this point, I shouldn't be so outraged. I shouldn't be so bothered by commentary. It goes on and on. Allegations, defendants (frickin Anne Rice...), um....it's an endless headache. I didn't even want to get all preachy and upset about it. What about the not-so-famous people who engage in this crap every single day? Toss another outrage log into the fire. It's messed up when anyone participates in it, but I suppose that when it's someone of a prominent nature, we expect much better of them. We expect other people to also agree with us. (Or not, in some cases.) When they do not, in comes the great divide and the endless, controversial debates. (Tumblr is a hotbed for such debates.)

  Being a sensitive ol piece of honey bun, the shock factor has lingered a bit. I'm actually getting a headache trying to get my thoughts out. The dialogue continues online, and it's really painting a dark picture of one of my favorite personalities. That sucks. Still, I wonder--why do people in the limelight think they are exempt from certain things? Don't they realize that what's done in the darkness will come into the light? Look back on the history of controversies, period. They come back...eventually. Come on. It must take too much to act
Basically how her supporters see her...
right on the first place. The worst part is people feeling like she should keep everything despite her actions. Food Network doesn't want to be in the middle of that crap. QVC has stuff to sell. It's business and common sense. People can get mad if they want to, but bills have to be paid. You screw with the bread flow, you get axed.

  But um...I guess I'm done now. I had to drop my two cents in, although it was a mixed up two cents no one asked for. It's been itching at me since I heard about it. Everyone has something to say about it. A lot of people keep saying so what and get over it. Yeah, it's nothing new and I guess that's what's so unappealing to it. We're used to this kind of unacceptable behavior. Little nugget for those of you who keep saying how long ago it was.

Rant over. Toss them rotten tomaters.

"Paula Deen" was made by Abi-Station


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